Tag: Jesus’s example

Gentle Words

On By vickleaIn Scripture5 Comments

Have you read harsh words from Jesus to any of His followers? Honestly, I haven’t. He rebuked, guided, cajoled, taught and spoke in parables. But harshness wasn’t his “go to” way to communicate. (I am not referring to Jesus with the money changers or the Pharisees. I am talking about when He was talking to those who followed Him.)

Have you ever had a harsh boss, someone who spoke in commands instead of leading by example? Having moved so many times and teaching in so many different states, I have experienced working with many principals who thought that they knew everything and were there to make sure that I knew that they already knew it all. How do you deal with harshness?

I am sad to confess that after years of dealing with one particular boss, I responded with snark and not a lot of respect. He absolutely got under my skin and knew it. I recall once he gave me a bad review on a lesson plan he came in to observe because I gave a test when he was there. What? When I met with him, I pointed out none too kindly that if he had bothered to read my lesson plans that were sent to him every Monday morning, he would have seen that the chapter test was planned for that day and I had no desire to change the date just because he came in to observe my teaching. Not the best side of me, I know, and I have repented since then. Nowadays, I am working on the whole gentle answer thing.

Responding with harshness makes the other person defensive and nothing is accomplished in the end. A gentle answer may or may not make the other person think about what they have said, but at least it gives me time to reflect on how I contributed to the situation and how I can best represent Jesus in it.

I recently had an altercation with a close relative. She lectured me about something I had not done, all online via a spoken text message. Lots of capital letters in there as she was shouting at me as she spoke and I could hear her in my mind. I could have defended myself and rightly pointed out that the accusation was unfounded, but instead, I responded something like, “I hope you have a good day.” I did not address the issue at all because I knew she was not ready to hear me.

Remember the old saying from your mom and grandmother? “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything.” I think that is sage advice when you are being attacked and know that you are defenseless against the assault of words coming your way. The best thing to do, I think, is not to defend. I recall that when Jesus was before the rulers, He did not defend Himself. He barely spoke a word, although He, of course, was right and they were deliberately accusing Him falsely. Instead, He let things play out, went to the cross and had the title over the cross “King of the Jews” as commanded by Pilate. The accusers wanted the title to say, “He says He is…” but Pilate shut that down with His authority and said it stood as he had decreed. Jesus didn’t have to defend Himself to be recognized as the Sovereign of the World.

Gentle answers are not easy to do. We want to rail at the person who is in our face, giving us “what for” and in no uncertain terms telling us what they think of us. Nevertheless, if we step back from the situation then we can reply gently and move on. Yes, our feelings are still hurt and we may be fuming on the inside. But it is up to us to control ourselves and not let anger take over.

Since the altercation, I have sent several texts sending holiday greetings and today I sent one asking about her health and telling her about new books coming out. She may/may not answer me at all. That has been my experience in the past. But it’s okay because I am keeping the door open in case she wants to come in and actually talk instead of attack.

I think about all of the problems going on in DC and throughout the nation. What would happen if one, just one person, decided to respond gently instead of with the same kind of vitriol that is being tossed their way? Maybe, just maybe, our leaders could go about the business of running the country instead of just their mouths. But I digress. This is not a political commentary but rather a social one.

I want to encourage my readers to think before you reply and to reply gently. That includes the whole “speaking with the fingers” thing that so many of us do daily. It is better, in my opinion, not to reply at all than to reply with harshness, even if what you were going to say is true. Truth doesn’t always make it kind, does it?

Have a thought-filled day!

Taking a Test

On By vickleaIn Admonition, Scripture, testimony2 Comments

I am fairly certain that no one enjoys taking tests. When I was in high school and college, I used to suffer from what people today call “test anxiety.” I would study diligently, but when I went to school to take the test, I would be so nervous that I wouldn’t remember what I had studied. I usually took deep breaths, looked away from the test and out the window or at something distracting and then took the test. I generally did well (except on math tests on which I scored lower than I wanted but high enough to stay on the honor roll), but I was never satisfied unless I got a top score.

When I became a mom, I encouraged my children to pray before tests. They had done their part by studying, so I instructed them to pray that God would help them remember what they had studied. I believe that as a result, all three children did well in school and had no more than what I considered normal test jitters. All three finished college and did well, so kudos to the Lord for getting them through.

So, what kind of tests do we take today? Every day we face a test of our faith with the choices we make and the things we do once we make that choice. Jesus showed us how to face life’s tests and excel by setting an example for us to prepare us for tests.

First, in the wilderness, Jesus answered Satan with God’s Word. We cannot give an answer to Satan or any friends, neighbors or acquaintances about our beliefs if we don’t study God’s Word diligently and faithfully. Jesus knew and applied God’s Word appropriately. I think when we hide God’s Word in our hearts, then the Holy Spirit will remind us of just what we need from His Word when we need it. (See John 14:26) We have to choose to turn from wickedness (sin) daily.

Jesus also prayed consistently and found a solitary place to do so, one without distractions.

It’s not always convenient to get up early or find a solitary place, but it is a part of being ready for life’s tests each day. Maybe you pray late at night or even in the middle of the day. Whenever and wherever you pray, be like Jesus and consistently make time to talk to God. You can’t hear from your Heavenly Father in the middle of a tough situation if you don’t regularly tune in to have a conversation with Him when there are no outside pressures.

Jesus was also continually in the temple. In fact, when He was arrested, He asked the officials why they came to arrest him in a garden at night instead of in the temple where he was daily. (Matthew 26:55) So should we not neglect getting together with other believers for the purpose of worship, fellowship, exhortation and enlightenment from His Word.

So, what does our test entail? What is on it? How do we pass it if we don’t know the questions? Well, the test is almost the same daily. What will you do if faced with temptation? Don’t say you are never tempted, because everyone is in some way. Just accept that it will happen. For example, your choices may be to watch a show you have really looked forward to or to spend time with your spouse and children. Which would be more pleasing to God? Watching the show is not a bad thing; it’s just not the best choice. Like a multiple choice test for which you are told to choose the BEST answer, there can be more than one right answer and you have to discern which one is the best one.

What will you do when you are with another person and the Holy Spirit is prodding you to share something about your faith? The quick answer is, of course, that you will share. But is that true? Or do you spend your time with non-believers talking about the weather, politics, health conditions and children? See how easily I named those things? That is because that is how I deflect from talking about the Lord. More and more, the Lord’s Spirit is prompting me to say something about Him and what He has done in my life. I don’t feel called to stand on a street corner with a sign that says “Repent” and follow that with preaching through a megaphone. But I can still offer hope to someone who doesn’t know the Lord just by sharing a word with them about God’s work in my life. I don’t have to give a sermon, just an encouraging word to get them thinking about God and His influence on their lives. It’s called sowing a seed and I want to get better at it.

Test anxiety is a real thing, but Jesus promises that He will be with us and that we will not fail, because loves never fails.

Okay, I am done telling you all about tests. Now, go out and do your best knowing that God goes with you and is cheering for you to pass with flying colors! Ask Him for the help you need to pass today’s test and He will help you…He promises!

Be Ready to Step Out

On By vickleaIn devotional, Scripture, YouVersion AppLeave a comment

I am not a “people person.” In fact, I am an introvert who enjoys books and interactions with people online, but I don’t enjoy going out to be among the masses of people. In fact, I was once diagnosed with agoraphobia (fear of crowded places) and was on medication and therapy as a result. I say all that because today’s devotional deals with stepping out and being with people. I cannot see Jesus just texting someone the answer to their prayer. He reached out and touched them. He spoke to them personally, listening and getting to know them and their needs. Jesus was a “people person” and if I am going to be like Jesus, I have to step out and be there for others. I am not sure how to begin, but as my father-in-law used to wisely say, “The best way to begin is just to start.”

From the YouVersion Bible App Devotional, “Daily Power, Day 5” by Craig Groeschel

Some people blame our lack of genuine community on the invention of the air conditioner. Before AC, people would sit on their front porches in the evenings and try to catch a breeze to cool off. They would wave at neighbors and visit with the ones who stopped to chat over a glass of lemonade. With air conditioning installed, people can stay inside and don’t have to interact with their neighbors.

Attaching garages to our houses didn’t help either. Instead of walking from our driveways or detached garages and exchanging greetings with neighbors along the way, we pull in, shut the door, and we’re inside our house. Fences, gated communities, answering machines, and caller ID reinforced this notion that we want to be left alone. We don’t have to interact with anyone, so we don’t. Now people interact online and through social media and really never have to interact. You can even shop online.

But Jesus always had time for other people. He talked to them, fed them, healed them, and forgave them. He often met physical needs in order to address spiritual needs. If we’re too busy even to interact with the people around us, let alone engage with their struggles, then we’re not following Christ’s example. And we’re also missing out on the blessing of loving and serving one another.

Today take the time to stop, listen, and talk with someone you see every day but rarely slow down to get to know.

Power Lift: Lord, it’s easy to make excuses about why I don’t engage with more people in my daily life. But you remind me to show your love to everyone I meet. Give me wisdom to know when to interrupt my schedule in order to bless those around me.