Okay, time for honesty again. I have my esophageal manometry tomorrow morning. The procedure as described to me sounds almost as harsh as its name. In other words, it doesn’t sound like any fun at all! Apparently, a tube is inserted into my nose and down my throat. Then, I will be placed in a reclining position, given a cup of water and told to swallow while the technician takes pictures. I don’t drink beverages in a reclining position for a reason. It’s called choking! So, tomorrow should be interesting. Suffice it to say that since I heard about this procedure, I have been anxious. Anxious about being able to complete it. Anxious about what it will show about my ability to swallow. Just anxious. So, today, the day before I head out to have it done, God dealt with my anxiety. In fact, He dealt the worry that is in me a death blow!

So, since the Scriptures say that this worrying won’t do me any good, why have I done it? I have taken worrying to an art form in my life…it’s one of the things that I am good at. I pray and I believe, and then I take it back and worry about it. God wants me to leave this thing on the altar once and for all, so there it lies. I’m not worrying about it. I’m choosing to let God take care of it for me.

I trust in Him and His love for me. None of this surgery stuff and all the tests that I have had to endure have taken God by surprise. He has been faithful to me and He has continually loved me. So, I am rejoicing in my deliverance from this whole ordeal, even before it’s all done. Because I know that God knows and sees the end of the whole thing. I can only take one step at a time, with my hand in His and singing songs of praise as I go.

I want my whole body to be so full of light that the technicians and nurses and doctors will know that I am different. And I am! I am a child of the King, and His lamp shines on me, even in the procedure rooms, even during the prep time. When I fell on Friday night, the old me would have started cursing and looking for someone or something to blame. Nope! The new me, the one on whom God is shining His light, blessed God that there was nothing broken and I took the blame for being clumsy or for having a weak knee that just gave out. Whatever the reason, I am thankful that I was not badly hurt. I am even more thankful that I remembered in that moment of calamity that I am God’s child, so I was able to control that hard-to-control tongue.

As I leave early in the morning with my husband to head to the hospital once again, this is my verse to take with me. God’s love never ends! It goes with me wherever I go and no matter what is happening in my life. My brother-in-law Dave contacted me on Saturday night to tell me that my youngest sister was admitted to the hospital with appendicitis and would undergo surgery on Sunday. So, I prayed. Denise had her surgery about six last night and she texted me today that she is being discharged. Isn’t God good? Not only does He love and take care of me, but He also takes care of the family members that I love. His love is faithful; I can depend on it, and so can you. His love doesn’t change with circumstances but grows inside you, making you a new person who doesn’t want to displease Him because of your great love for Him and appreciation of His sacrifice for you. Try and see that the Lord is good! You will be glad that you did because it will mean a lifetime of love from the Heavenly Father who created you. Blessings and prayers.