So, for those who have been following my blog, you know that I went to see my surgeon on Monday to talk about my upcoming surgery. I was very disappointed to find out that since my tests had been postponed (due to the doctors’ lack of communication with each other), my surgical appointment was postponed until February 18th. I was distraught because I had already missed Christmas with my youngest grandchildren and now I would miss a birthday, too. Anyway, after I calmed down and turned my eyes back on the Lord who created me, I was thankful to have an appointment at all and a surgery that promises to correct my digestive issues. I will have robotic assisted laparoscopic paraesophageal surgery with partial fundiplication. That’s a whole lot of words that simply mean a robot will assist in the surgery so the incisions are smaller and the fundiplication means that the doctor is wrapping my esophagus to strengthen it. I am very thankful for technology and the know how of doctors, but I know that in the end, the Lord is directing the hands of the surgeon and will be present to heal me, Lord willing.

I didn’t post yesterday because I was busy with errands with my husband. But I was keeping up with the news and was very upset about the legislature in New York passing an abortion bill on the anniversary of Roe V. Wade. I am unabashedly and unapologetically pro-life. Whenever I vote for anyone, one of the first things that I want to know is if they stand for the protection of the unborn. Yes, I have heard all of the arguments: What about the mother’s rights? What about rape? Incest? There are many compelling arguments, but none of them has swayed me to stop standing for the life of the innocent unborn child, the one whom God created. In spite of the sins in the world, God gives life and I think it is an abomination for man to decide that he can destroy it. In the Old Testament, God warned His people about not sacrificing their children to Molech, a false god who demanded the sacrifice of the young. I think that abortion is the Molech of our times and I fear for those who would promote such an “in your face” rebellion towards God. But isn’t our entire world either running from God or rebelling openly against Him? There are a few who stand for what is right, but most are silent in the face of this open defiance of the standards of God.

From the womb, God created me to worship Him and be a person who knows to Whom I owe my life, every breath and step I take. So, it is not up to me to judge what others do. God is the final judge. I am just saying and putting it out there for others to ponder that God considers life sacred because it came from the Creator of all. I hate that so many have been deceived into thinking that the baby in the womb has no feelings or is just a bit of tissue that is inconvenient and needs to be wiped away. From the moment of conception, my belief is that it’s a baby, not a choice. Yes, bad things happen. But I believe that God can take care of the evil in the world when we are bowing down to His altar, not when we are always thinking about what is best for ourselves. In this time of my life, when I am facing so much uncertainty about my surgery and how things will turn out, I still know that the One I trust is the Giver of life and He should be the only One who can take it away.

Many years ago, I had the privilege of teaching a young teen girl who was pregnant and wanted an abortion. I talked to her about the Scriptures, went with her to talk to her parents and got to be present when she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. That baby boy has served our country well, a member of our armed forces who has been to Afghanistan and Iraq, a miracle child who was destined for abortion, but his mom decided to choose to give him life. I’m glad that she did and I hope that others who read this blog will think about life and how choices that we make determine the way the lives of others may turn out. If you have to choose, choose life! Blessings!

It has been almost six weeks since I first received my diagnosis of a large hernia in my abdomen that would require surgery. I have gone from one medical test to another and finally finished the last torturous one last week. Now, I am finally going to meet with my surgeon today for my pre-op consultation. God has been with me the whole way, comforting me when I cried out to Him and giving me encouragement when I needed it. These are His Words to me today. Each time I have gone for a medical test, I have prayed that God will allow me to be a good witness to those who are doing the tests. So many things went wrong that sometimes I questioned whether God had answered my prayers, but looking back, I realize that the trials that I faced, even in the midst of the medical tests, were there for me to work on being a good witness. I did not lash out angrily at the technician who caused me such pain because she was unable to place the tubing correctly. Nor did I fuss at the people involved in the heart test that ended up taking twice the amount of time that it was supposed to. You see, God is using this whole experience to prune me, to get rid of the bad branches not producing fruit and to make sure that the other branches of my life are whole and healthy. While I have been concerned about my physical body, God has been working on my spiritual one. That’s the one that is eternal and He wants it be the best that it can be. Do you have a relationship with the Father? Do things go wrong, so wrong that you wonder if He is even there with you? Maybe that’s Him working on you to make you more like Him. I am in no way saying that every bad thing that happens in our lives is God working in us. But I do know that He can take the bad things and use them for our good. He does have a purpose of each of us. Maybe that technician who really hurt me needed to know the power of forgiveness and love that day. Perhaps the heart technicians needed to work with someone who wasn’t grumpy because the delay was extraordinarily long. Maybe this is the day for you to look at God and ask Him what you can do to show Him to a lost world. Today is the day I see my surgeon. I’m not expecting things to go perfectly well, but I am expecting God to meet me in that office and to be with me so that I can be the witness that He created me to be. Whatever you face today, whomever you cross paths with, just remember that God is right beside you and He wants to help you to be your best. I don’t know what happened in the offices after I left, but I hope that the nurses and technicians will remember the old lady who blessed them instead of cursing them and who tried to smile throughout the procedures. I am a Child of the King and I want to go out into the world daily, with my crown on straight and my priorities in order. I will not give up on God because He has never given up on me. All that matters is representing the risen Savior to the world! Go out and be His ambassador today. Blessings!

Stu graciously chose me to participate in The Eclectic Contrarian’s challenge. The challenge is to be given a photo and then write a story based on the photo. Thus, the Tell the Story Challenge. This is a wild idea, so thank you Stu for choosing me to participate. You can read Stu’s post, Tell the Story-The Blemished Lamb at the link provided.

Here are the rules that John set up:

Write a story about the picture you’re given.

Select 3 nominees.

Give them a new picture.

Here is the photo that Stu gave me:

So, here I am just standing around in the forest and all of these things seem to be climbing on me and clinging to me for all they’re worth. It seems that I have become a support system for a bunch of other living things. That seems to be my purpose in life. Other trees get to be cut down and become parts of beautiful homes. Some get cut up and become tree houses for laughing children. But, not me! I just support all of this greenery. But, my Father in Heaven who created me must have wanted me to be just what I am. So, here I stand, supporting others who need me. I’m a tree, but I’m important to others, and to God.

For this challenge, I nominate the following bloggers:

Sunshiny SA

Chris Hall

Shae’s Days

And here is your photo:

Photo from The Audubon Society of Portland.

Have fun with this and enjoy telling the story!

In today’s busy world with all of the demands on our time, it’s hard to take time to actually call someone and have a conversation. I usually use texting because that way I get a quick reply. But the other day, after my procedure that was awful, I really wanted to talk to my grandchildren in Pennsylvania, the ones I see so infrequently. So, I texted my daughter and asked if we could do a FaceTime call. She said yes and gave me a time. I got to talk to each of my beloved grandchildren one at a time. We stayed on the phone for almost an hour, but it somehow didn’t seem that long.

This morning, my devotional was in Psalm 17. I have been calling on God a lot lately, and it’s not a quick text with a quick reply. I have been pouring out my hopes and fears to Him and He has sent His Holy Spirit to minister to me, right where I am.

I call on the Lord, knowing well that He will answer. He listens to what I say and really hears me. When I tell Him my frustrations about all of the delays before the surgery, He is there to calm and quiet my spirit. Lately, I have been telling Him honestly about my fears, the fear of going into the hospital and not ever getting out, just as happened with my two friends. But God doesn’t leave me in the place of fear. He again calms me and tells me that He is walking this journey with me. There is nothing happening to me that took Him by surprise, so He is ready and willing to help me through all of the obstacles of just living here with this body that is breaking down.

I am His child and He is protecting me and hiding me under the shadow of His wings. I have contemplated that before, but it is becoming more real to me now. He holds out His arms to me and I run to them and hide safely and securely in them. When we lived in South Carolina, our neighbor had chickens. Now, I didn’t much care for them and all of the mess that they made, but I did notice that when there were baby chicks and I approached the little hen house and fenced enclosure where Ava kept them, the mama hen clucked loudly and the babies all ran to her. She lifted her wings and the babies ran under there. Then, she folded her wings down and it was as if there were no baby chicks at all; she hid them from the danger of a stranger who was accompanied by two dogs (our children’s pets at the time). Anyway, that image has been in my mind this morning as I read this Scripture. I am hidden under the shadow of the wings of the Almighty and I can trust that I will be safe! Hallelujah!

I have been feeling God’s presence ever closer to me as I spend more time with Him. He never leaves me. He is in the smile of the stranger at the hospital, someone also awaiting a procedure. He is in the strong arms of my husband, hugging me as I fall asleep. He is in the laughter and sparking eyes of my grandchildren as they tell me of their adventures and show me their skill on the gymnastics bars. What we are all really awaiting is to see the face of God. If I go to sleep in the hospital and awaken in Heaven, then I will see His face. That’s a promise, not something to fear, but the reality that I am facing. So, if I live, that will be wonderful…more years with my family! But, if I die, I will be with the Lord, gazing on His face and totally satisfied with His presence. What does that mean for me now? I continue to seek Him and His presence. I am doing whatever He tells me to do to “occupy until He comes.” I am part of the Lord’s occupying army here on earth, and I am going to do my best to show His love and mercy and grace to whomever I meet. That is what He would have us do.

Are you part of His army? Are you spending time with the Commander-in-Chief, who is the Lord God? Do you know what He wants you to do today? The God of all mercy, the Lord of Heaven’s armies wants you to know that He loves you with an everlasting love and He wants to assure you (and me) that we are in His presence and that we are safe. We can call on Him anytime and get an answer. Blessings today as you look for the ways that God wants you to serve Him and be an active member of His army!

Who You Say I Am by Hillsong

I start each day the same way, with my morning medication and my devotional. God speaks to me daily, the words that I will need for that day, the words to strengthen me and give me the resolve to continue fighting the daily battles. Why do I keep going? Why not just give up and give in? Because the Lord is my portion. He is my deliverer, and each day He hands me a cup of blessings. It may be as simple as a text from one of my children. This morning, it was a tag on Facebook with an encouraging picture from my daughter. Last night, it was my husband holding me as I went to sleep. God makes sure that I receive a blessing daily. I just have to be ready and watch for it, accepting it as a blessing from Him when it comes. There are days that are harder than others, like yesterday, for example. But I always keep in mind that God is right beside me and I will not be afraid. God holds my future. He already knows what will happen on the other side of this surgery. I’m believing Him to get me through this ordeal and to take me to the other side, ready to continue to be His faithful servant. Do you start each day with God? If you do, isn’t He wonderful? If you don’t, you are missing out on the blessings that He has for you. Just as many of you get up each morning and turn on the coffee maker, thinking that you can’t get through the morning without that caffeine, you also need to turn your thoughts to God. Let Him speak to you through His Word each morning. Start each day acknowledging your Creator and Savior, and let Him guide you through whatever obstacles you face in life each day. That’s what I have been doing for almost forty-six years and He has never let me down. Does He sometimes do things that baffle me? Of course! He is God and He can’t be put into a box of my making. The journey on earth is filled with trials, but God promises to walk beside us. Won’t you invite Him to be a part of your journey today? Let Him hold on to you as you walk through today and all the days to come! Blessings and prayers for a God-filled day.

Just Be Held by Casting Crowns

I don’t know that I can say that I counted today as joy, but I can say that I am happy that it is over! My nurse/technician was a real sweetheart named Tammy. She did everything she could to insure that I was comfortable and without pain, but to no avail. You see, my body did not cooperate at first. She tried inserting the two foot tubing into my right nostril and got stuck near where my hernia is. So, she had me change my position on the chair, which seemed to help. She was very happy when she was able to get it into the 46 cm position at which she needed it to do the measurements ordered by the surgeon. Unfortunately, she got the tubing in and her computer crashed. No, I am not kidding! I had already prayed my way through that first insertion and was feeling pretty good that the torture part was over. But she had to pull out the tubing and restart her computer, apologizing that it had never happened before. So, she started again, giving me a minute or two to take deep breaths and be ready for the pain that I knew was coming. The second time, Tammy could not get the tubing all the way into my stomach which was where she needed it to be. I was tearing up at this point, still praying, but beginning to cry because she was manipulating the tubing and couldn’t get it into place. So, once again, she removed it and said that my option was to try again, with the supervisor inserting the tubing, or to quit and schedule an appointment under anesthesia. Well, since I had to wait two weeks for this appointment and I just wanted this whole ordeal over, I told her that I wanted to try again. This time when Tammy removed the tubing, my nose poured blood. I used tissues to take care of that problem while she went to get Donna to try to place the tubing. Donna, the supervisor, came in and took about 10 minutes to get the tube in place. Then, she left Tammy to finish the test which consisted of my swallowing liquid on command and not swallowing (or choking) between times. Let me tell you, I spent the time in prayer. After another 15 minutes, the test was finally over. The tube was removed from my left nostril (since my right was bleeding, we had to change sides), I was cleaned up and given discharge orders. What an ordeal! I knew it would be hard, but I didn’t expect that! After I left, with a very sore throat and nasal passages burning, I began to reflect on what had happened. Because I had prayed that God would use me to witness to the hospital staff, I was surprised that I should have had such difficulties. Upon further reflection, I am not surprised. After all, I had the opportunity to show them that prayer works, since I had told Tammy from the beginning that I was going to pray during the procedure. I also gave her a hug when I left, showing her that I had absolutely no hard feelings for her just because the test was harder than it should have been, for me and for her. So, I endured, and I am expecting God to use today to work a more mature attitude in me. This was a test of my faith, and although I am sure that I did not pass with flying colors (since I started to cry), I did pass and I am moving on to the next step in getting this whole hernia thing repaired. I hope that you all had a great day today, and I sincerely appreciate all of your prayers. My husband jokingly says that I survived my water boarding. I would be amused, but he’s not far off in his description, in my opinion. I’ve never been really water boarded, though, so let’s just say this was a form of medical torture that God is using to perfect me. Blessings.

Okay, time for honesty again. I have my esophageal manometry tomorrow morning. The procedure as described to me sounds almost as harsh as its name. In other words, it doesn’t sound like any fun at all! Apparently, a tube is inserted into my nose and down my throat. Then, I will be placed in a reclining position, given a cup of water and told to swallow while the technician takes pictures. I don’t drink beverages in a reclining position for a reason. It’s called choking! So, tomorrow should be interesting. Suffice it to say that since I heard about this procedure, I have been anxious. Anxious about being able to complete it. Anxious about what it will show about my ability to swallow. Just anxious. So, today, the day before I head out to have it done, God dealt with my anxiety. In fact, He dealt the worry that is in me a death blow!

So, since the Scriptures say that this worrying won’t do me any good, why have I done it? I have taken worrying to an art form in my life…it’s one of the things that I am good at. I pray and I believe, and then I take it back and worry about it. God wants me to leave this thing on the altar once and for all, so there it lies. I’m not worrying about it. I’m choosing to let God take care of it for me.

I trust in Him and His love for me. None of this surgery stuff and all the tests that I have had to endure have taken God by surprise. He has been faithful to me and He has continually loved me. So, I am rejoicing in my deliverance from this whole ordeal, even before it’s all done. Because I know that God knows and sees the end of the whole thing. I can only take one step at a time, with my hand in His and singing songs of praise as I go.

I want my whole body to be so full of light that the technicians and nurses and doctors will know that I am different. And I am! I am a child of the King, and His lamp shines on me, even in the procedure rooms, even during the prep time. When I fell on Friday night, the old me would have started cursing and looking for someone or something to blame. Nope! The new me, the one on whom God is shining His light, blessed God that there was nothing broken and I took the blame for being clumsy or for having a weak knee that just gave out. Whatever the reason, I am thankful that I was not badly hurt. I am even more thankful that I remembered in that moment of calamity that I am God’s child, so I was able to control that hard-to-control tongue.

As I leave early in the morning with my husband to head to the hospital once again, this is my verse to take with me. God’s love never ends! It goes with me wherever I go and no matter what is happening in my life. My brother-in-law Dave contacted me on Saturday night to tell me that my youngest sister was admitted to the hospital with appendicitis and would undergo surgery on Sunday. So, I prayed. Denise had her surgery about six last night and she texted me today that she is being discharged. Isn’t God good? Not only does He love and take care of me, but He also takes care of the family members that I love. His love is faithful; I can depend on it, and so can you. His love doesn’t change with circumstances but grows inside you, making you a new person who doesn’t want to displease Him because of your great love for Him and appreciation of His sacrifice for you. Try and see that the Lord is good! You will be glad that you did because it will mean a lifetime of love from the Heavenly Father who created you. Blessings and prayers.

Last night, I was doing my regular chore of going into the front bedroom and feeding my kitty. As I left her room and headed down the short hallway, I suddenly fell. Flat on my face on the carpet. I called out for my husband who was in our bedroom resting after a long day of driving into town. He came and checked me out, then provided a chair to help me to get up. Well, my glasses were bent (but not broken), my face is scratched up from carpet burn and my knee is sore because it hit the ground first. But, praise God! No broken bones. Nothing that won’t heal with time! So, why am I telling you about my lack of balance and my fall? Because this morning, I related it to the Scriptures that tell me that when I fall, I am to get up.

Like the Proverbs say, I got up again. I didn’t stay down on the floor; there was nothing for me there. However, can’t you just picture it? The wicked fall into sin more and more because they fit in there and just stay in their comfort zone. I praise God that wickedness is not where my comfortable place is; I am God’s righteousness and I am only comfortable being in a right place with Him.

I could not have gotten off the floor last night if it had not been for the encouragement of my husband and the Lord’s strength and help that He gave me. I was hurting quite a bit, but I knew that staying on the floor was not where I needed to be. So, even in my anguish and distress, I put my hope in the Lord. My husband called our daughter and she prayed with us for me to be okay physically. You see, my blood pressure is a concern as is my hernia right now because we don’t want any extra stress that would cause my stomach to wrap itself around my heart. With the prayers of my husband and my daughter, I was able to sit in the chair and control my breathing, knowing that God was still right there with me. I waited for Him and He met me right where I was, hurting and fearful of the consequences of my fall. God knew my needs and met them. My husband comforted me, brought me a protein shake to sip on and managed to straighten my glasses enough so that I can wear them until I can get to the optical shop. I am so thankful for a believing Christian daughter and husband who were there when I needed them. But mostly, I am thankful for the Lord who spoke to my heart and told me to get up and then showed me the Scriptures this morning related to falling down. Yes, I fell, but I got up again. Are you down on the ground with the wicked? You, too, can get up again, trust in the name of Jesus the Savior and move on with your life. It’s a beautiful day to serve the Lord! Blessings and prayers for a day of service and love!

God appeared to Abraham, telling him clearly that Sarah would have a child, even in her old age. And from that offspring, Isaac, would come the nation of Israel and ultimately the Savior of the world. You see, God had a plan and He would make sure that it came to pass. We look at things through our human eyes and understanding. God, who sees and knows all things, does the impossible and we shake our heads in amazement. I will never cease to be amazed at God’s great love and miraculous works. I am certain that He is at work on my behalf daily; I just don’t have my spiritual eyes open to all that He is doing for me.

My word for the year is “trust” and God is helping me with that word by reminding me in my devotional that nothing is impossible with Him beside me. I am facing a procedure on Tuesday that one friend described as excruciatingly painful and uncomfortable. It is the final test that I have to go through before I am cleared for surgery. Well, guess what? I am not happy about the procedure, but I am confident that I will have the Lord right beside me, helping me through it. That’s right, through it! Not around it, but right through it. After all, nothing is impossible with God and I am believing that this test will be nothing for God. No biggie for my Father in Heaven who loves me!

In two of the gospels, Jesus repeats that nothing is impossible with God. Just who do I think that I am to question the Lord? After all, He left the Father, came to earth as man and then returned to the Father. Since He knew the Father more intimately than I could ever hope to, I am taking Him at His Word. God said it, so that settles it for me. I am praying in His will, as His child, that He will take care of me through all of the trials that I have to go through. He has come through for me so many times in the past, so why should I doubt that He will come through for me this time? God and I are on a team together after all. It’s called the “Believe Team.” I hope that you will join it and see how great it is to wake up each day knowing that God wants what is best for you. You just have to believe in your heart that Jesus is your Savior and ask Him to be a part of your life everyday. That’s a simplified version, but trust me when I tell you that the best thing that you could ever do in your entire life is to become part of God’s “Believe Team.” That’s why I won’t be discouraged when a friend tells me that the procedure is awful. Indeed, perhaps it was for her! But I am trusting God to walk through this test with me. No matter how uncomfortable it is, I will have God right beside me. Let me tell you a little story. About fourteen years ago, I had knee surgery on my right knee. It was not until after I had the surgery that it was discovered that I am allergic to all opioids. Yep! The meds to help me through the pain of rehabilitation were not useful to me at all because I went into an immediate asthma attack when they were administered. So, I went daily to my rehab and called on the name of Jesus. When my therapist asked me what I wanted to be able to do with my surgically repaired knee, I replied that I wanted to be able to kneel in prayer. He looked at me skeptically and said that would be difficult and maybe impossible, but he would help me to work on it. Was there pain involved? Of course! But, I prayed each time I went, calling on the name of Jesus during the extreme pain of bending my leg at that joint. (Anyone who has had knee surgery can relate, I’m sure.) By the time I was released from therapy, I could kneel in prayer. God answered the desires of my heart, even without pain meds to get me through it. So, a procedure that lasts less than an hour will be no big deal to my Heavenly Father. Nothing is impossible with Him! I’m holding on to that promise and I hope that you are, too. Blessings and prayers for a God-filled weekend!